Positive discipline

I found this great page which is all about dealing with kids when they are doing something you don't like.

http://www.pbs.org/parents/talkingwithkids/positive_discipline_tips.html

I think it's so great because it doesn't just apply to children. Because its based on evidence based techniques rather than opinion, myths, and old wives tales, it has ideas that will be useful to anyone in any walk of life. The tips make sense just as well for an employee who doesn't behave the way you'd like them to or for a pet who you really wish would stop doing the really annoying thing. Just replace the word child with trainee, employee,  dog, horse, cat etc Maybe even husband/wife? 😊

To demonstrate, I've messed with it below. Appologies to the author and the people quoted for changing their words but this is a case where the truth shines through regardless of the words.
Here are 7 tips for correcting a misbehaving dog effectively:

It's the ultimate do-as-I-say-and-not-as-I-do dog training  moment: your dog is barking again and in an effort to control her noise, you counter with your own: "Stop yelling now!"

You have just entered into a disciplinary arms race in which there are no winners—only hurt feelings, sore throats and soaring blood pressure. But dog training doesn't have to be a battle. Proponents of positive discipline teach that dogs can—and will—behave without threats, bribes, yelling and physicality. Here are seven tips that will set you on the path to better behavior—and a stronger, more peaceful connection with your dog.

1. Understand the meaning behind the behavior. Dogs want to behave well; if they seem to miss the mark, it's not without a valid reason. "The most important [thing] is to realize that whatever a dog does, we may label as bad, [but really] the dog is doing the best he can. It's our job as owners to find out why [he is] doing it,". "Once we know the valid root of the behavior, we can easily remove the cause or heal the emotions, and the dog won't be driven to behave in that way anymore."
   
   So ask yourself: is your dog chewing the sofa in a desperate bid for your attention? Maybe you stayed on the phone too long or ignored her as you rushed to get dinner on the table. If so, what correction can you make to your own behavior that will satisfy your dog's need? "A lot of what we expect of dogs is unreasonable,".
2. Focus on controlling yourself—not your dog. It's hard to keep cool in the heat of the moment, but owners need to model the types of behavior they want their dog to emulate. Remember, yelling begets yelling, aggression  begets aggression. " We should not do anything in front of [our dogs] that we don't want them to do," she advises. In the case of an extreme behavioral flare-up, this may mean counting to 10, taking a deep breath or simply walking away until you've had time to collect yourself.
   
   Jim Fay, the founder of the organization Love and Logic, agrees. "Anger and frustration feed misbehavior," he says. Fay offers an unusual tactic for keeping your voice in check: instead of yelling that your dog is doing something wrong, try singing it. Fay teaches parents what he calls the "Uh Oh" song. If your dig has a problem of running off on walks, getting angry at him will only ruin your recall so, you might sing, "Uh Oh, that's sad you chased rabbits again. I think it's time you went on the lead."
3. Be consistent with your expectations. Owners often overlook a certain behavior in the hope that it will pass. But guess what? It doesn't pass. If your dog gets too rough playing with another dog, for instance, then it is time to remove her from the situation and seek help before it becomes aggression.
4. Give attention to the behavior you like—not the behavior you don't. Dogs often act up because they want your attention, so sometimes it pays to ignore those actions you don't want to see more of. Kersey calls this the "Rain on the grass, not on the weeds" principle. Mouthing or whining? Play deaf or walk away, and your dog will quickly learn that there's a better way to communicate.
5. Redirect, redirect, redirect. Dogs who hear "No" or "Don't" all the time tend to tune those directives out. So instead of telling your dog what not to do, Kersey recommends instead offering a positive behavior to replace the misbehavior. For instance, a dog that keeps jumping up at people, could be taught how to weave through people's legs, or a dog that runs off with the laundry could be taught to hand you the pegs.
6. Exploit the "energy drain." This is the only one that won't work for an animal.
7. Don't bribe. It may be tempting to offer your dog a cookie for behaving well or doing something you want, but Fay warns against it. Offering a dog a reward sends the wrong message.
   
   Instead, Fay says, "the best reward for a dog is time with the owners." Kersey agrees that quality time is key to a happy, well-behaved dog. She recommends that each owner spend at least 15 minutes one-on-one connecting with a dog every day. "Do something your dog wants to do [during that time]," says Kersey. "Whisper in their ear how wonderful they are, how much you love them. … It's the best investment you can make in your dog.

What do you think? Does it work for you?